The Enquirer reports, "That's the stunned reaction of an eyewitness who says he watched in shock – and snapped photos – as the former presidential candidate's wife romantically kissed a long-haired man who resembles 'a washed-up '80s rock musician.'"

A McCain spokesperson declined comment. Normally, we wouldn't believe the Enquirer, however – they did get this right.

Barack Obama's acceptance speech is below:

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It’s the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.

It’s the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled – Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

It’s the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It’s been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America.

I just received a very gracious call from Senator McCain. He fought long and hard in this campaign, and he’s fought even longer and harder for the country he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine, and we are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader. I congratulate him and Governor Palin for all they have achieved, and I look forward to working with them to renew this nation’s promise in the months ahead.

I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on that train home to Delaware, the Vice President-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.

I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last sixteen years, the rock of our family and the love of my life, our nation’s next First Lady, Michelle Obama. Sasha and Malia, I love you both so much, and you have earned the new puppy that’s coming with us to the White House. And while she’s no longer with us, I know my grandmother is watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight, and know that my debt to them is beyond measure.

To my campaign manager David Plouffe, my chief strategist David Axelrod, and the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics – you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you’ve sacrificed to get it done.

But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to – it belongs to you.

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn’t start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington – it began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston.

It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give five dollars and ten dollars and twenty dollars to this cause. It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation’s apathy; who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep; from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on the doors of perfect strangers; from the millions of Americans who volunteered, and organized, and proved that more than two centuries later, a government of the people, by the people and for the people has not perished from this Earth. This is your victory.

I know you didn’t do this just to win an election and I know you didn’t do it for me. You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime – two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century. Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us. There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after their children fall asleep and wonder how they’ll make the mortgage, or pay their doctor’s bills, or save enough for college. There is new energy to harness and new jobs to be created; new schools to build and threats to meet and alliances to repair.

The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even one term, but America – I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there. I promise you – we as a people will get there.

There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won’t agree with every decision or policy I make as President, and we know that government can’t solve every problem. But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And above all, I will ask you join in the work of remaking this nation the only way it’s been done in America for two-hundred and twenty-one years – block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

What began twenty-one months ago in the depths of winter must not end on this autumn night. This victory alone is not the change we seek – it is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were. It cannot happen without you.

So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism; of service and responsibility where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves, but each other. Let us remember that if this financial crisis taught us anything, it’s that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers – in this country, we rise or fall as one nation; as one people.

Let us resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long. Let us remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House – a party founded on the values of self-reliance, individual liberty, and national unity. Those are values we all share, and while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress. As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, “We are not enemies, but friends…though passion may have strained it must not break our bonds of affection.” And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn – I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your President too.

And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of our world – our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand. To those who would tear this world down – we will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security – we support you. And to all those who have wondered if America’s beacon still burns as bright – tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from our the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity, and unyielding hope.

For that is the true genius of America – that America can change. Our union can be perfected. And what we have already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.

This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that’s on my mind tonight is about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She’s a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing – Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn’t vote for two reasons – because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.

And tonight, I think about all that she’s seen throughout her century in America – the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can’t, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.

At a time when women’s voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.

When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs and a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.

When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.

She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that “We Shall Overcome.” Yes we can.

A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination. And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change. Yes we can.

America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves – if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our time – to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth – that out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and doubt, and those who tell us that we can’t, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people:

Yes We Can. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America.

John McCain is still working it on the campaign trail. (AP Images)

Tina Fey does a wicked Sarah Palin, but we're thinking that maybe it's getting just a little bit old. Good thing, too, considering the election is only three days away.

Over in the better-late-than-never camp, however, John McCain's campaign wizzards worked hard to get the Republican presidential candidate on SNL in hopes of catching some last-minute votes. Was it any good? Sure. But it won't come close to hitting the kind of numbers Sarah Palin's visit brought. Tina Fey's popular political parody of Sarah Palin — along with Palin's personal visit — brought SNL its highest ratings in 14 years. Ah well. At the very least both candidates are reaching an audience that may not have otherwise given the election (or voting) a second thought.

There's still time to bet on who you think will become the next US president. Get all your political props over at the Bodog Sportsbook.

TMZ is reporting that Joe McCain apparently called 911 to get a traffic update on Tuesday. We kid you not.  When the 911 operator told Joe that calling 911 for a traffic update was a misuse of emergency services, Joe screamed, "Fuck you!" and hung up.

The operator promptly called hiim back and got his voicemail, which hilariously included a "vote for John McCain" endorsement. We're betting she's probably voting for Obama now.

Joe apparently called into a radio station to apologize. TMZ has the audio. Will McCain pull an ace out of his sleeve and win the election? Bet on the election in the Bodog Sportsbook today.

At one point, Obama joked that you could see the Russian Tea Room from the Waldorf Astoria Hotel.

For his part, McCain made said, "Even in this room full of proud Manhattan Democrats, I can't shake the feeling that some people here are pulling for me." He added, "I'm delighted to see you here tonight, Hillary."

Be sure you get all your presidential betting in the Bodog Sportsbook today.

However, last night McCain bravely appeared on The Late Show and sheepishly told Letterman, "I screwed up."

Letterman immediately asked McCain: "Can you stay?"

"Yes, sir," Mr. McCain said, adding, "Depends on how bad it gets."

Though when Letterman pressed him for details on why he lied about having to rush to the airport, McCain just repeated, "I screwed up."

Thursday's interview was just for laughs though, as Letterman asked McCain point-blank whether VP Sarah Palin's is prepared to lead the country through "the next 9/11 attack."

"Absolutely," she is, McCain said. "She has inspired Americans. That's the thing we need."

Will McCain be the next U.S. president? Get all your presidential betting in the Bodog Sportsbook today.

The McCain campaign got wind of the fact that Wurzelbacher confronted Obama on his tax increases for businesses who make over $250K. Apparently, Wurzelbacher's plumbing company earned $250 – $280K annually and that under Barack Obama's tax plan, he would face a tax hike – robbing him of his "American Dream."

Obama said that under his proposals, taxes on any revenue below $250,000 would remain the same, but that earnings above that level would be subject to a 39% tax, instead of the current 36% rate. He added that 95% of small businesses earned less than $250,000 and that he wanted to give those small businesses a tax cut.

During the debate, John McCain brought up Joe a dozen times.

"Joe wants to buy the business that he's been in for all these years. Worked 10, 12 hours a day. But he looked at your tax plan and he saw that he was going to pay much higher taxes," Mr McCain said.

"And what you want to do, to Joe the plumber, means more like him have their taxes increased, and not be able to realize the American dream."

Interesting to note: If message board commentor Trina31 is correct, Wurzelbacher already owns several businesses and isn't even registered to vote.

How to Play: Before the debate, visit John McCain Bingo and print one copy of this game card for each player, refreshing the page before each print, or have the players print their own bingo cards. These instructions will not be printed. You can also select card only and multiple card versions of this page when playing on line, or with a PDA.

Check off each block when you hear these words during the speech or debate. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout OBAMA!

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The 90-minute debate will air on all the major networks and will be replayed by CNN on Friday morning at 9 a.m. It can also be viewed live at www.mydebates.org. Two presidential debates between Barack Obama and John McCain will follow on Tuesday, Oct. 7 at 9 p.m. EST and Wednesday, October 15.

After some uncomfortable and unflattering interviews with Katie Couric, Palin will have to brush up on, well, just about everything.

Couric: Is that something you shouldn’t say out loud, Sen. McCain?

John McCain: Of course not. But, look, I understand this day and age of “gotcha” journalism. Is that a pizza place? In a conversation with someone who you didn’t hear … the question very well, you don’t know the context of the conversation, grab a phrase. Gov. Palin and I agree that you don’t announce that you’re going to attack another country …

Couric: Are you sorry you said it?

McCain: and the fact

Couric: Governor?

McCain: Wait a minute. Before you say, “is she sorry she said it,” this was a “gotcha” sound bite that, look …

Couric: It wasn’t a “gotcha.” She was talking to a voter.

McCain: No, she was in a conversation with a group of people and talking back and forth. And … I’ll let Gov. Palin speak for herself.

Palin: Well, it in fact, you’re absolutely right on. In the context, this was a voter, a constituent, hollering out a question from across an area asking, “What are you gonna do about Pakistan? You better have an answer to Pakistan.” I said we’re gonna do what we have to do to protect the United States of America.

Couric: But you were pretty specific about what you wanted to do, cross-border …

Palin: Well, as Sen. McCain is suggesting here, also, never would our administration get out there and show our cards to terrorists, in this case, to enemies and let them know what the game plan was, not when that could ultimately adversely affect a plan to keep America secure.

Couric: What did you learn from that experience?

Palin: That this is all about “gotcha” journalism. A lot of it is. But that’s okay, too.

Couric: Gov. Palin, since our last interview, you’ve gotten a lot of flak. Some Republicans have said you’re not prepared; you’re not ready for prime-time. People have questioned your readiness since that interview. And I’m curious …

Palin: Yeah.

Couric: to hear your reaction.

Palin: Well, not only am I ready, but willing and able to serve as vice-president with Sen. McCain if Americans so bless us and privilege us with the opportunity of serving them, ready with my executive experience as a city mayor and manager, as a governor, as a commissioner, a regulator of oil and gas.

McCain: This is not the first time that I’ve seen a governor being questioned by some quote, “expert.” I remember that Ronald Reagan was a “cowboy.” President Clinton was a governor of a very small state that had “no experience” either. (laughter) I remember how easy it was gonna be for Bush I to defeat him. I still recall, whoops, that one. But the point is I’ve seen underestimation before. I’m very proud of the excitement that Gov. Palin has ignited with our party and around this country. It is a … level of excitement and enthusiasm, frankly, that I haven’t seen before. And I’d like to attribute it to me. But the fact is that she has done incredible job. And I’m so proud of the work that she’s doing.

The full interview can be found here and here. Want to be on whether Sarah Palin will become the next VP? Get all your presidential betting odds in the Bodog Sportsbook today.