Rumor has it, Lohan went on a huge penis binge after she was dumped by girlfriend Samantha Ronson. By the way, I've always wanted to say "penis binge." Now I can die happy.

A source for Ian Undercover said, “She’s going through big emotional turmoil.  She’s not sure if she’ll have it or go through with an abortion that she booked to have in the next few days. Saddest part is she has no idea who the father is.  She must have slept with more than two dozen men in the past couple of months.”

In conclusion, we're not the Washington Post, but we do bring you dubious celebrity gossip, right? You're welcome!

Lohan tells Ellen, "I had no idea what was going on. I just hadn't seen her in like a week. She like, disappeared."

Lindsay went on to say that contrary to reports, there was no cheating going on. Though she did take the time to mention that her father cheated on her mother for her "entire life."

"I don't believe in cheating on someone," she added. "You know when people are together so much it gets really difficult and you forget who you are because you're more concerned about being with the other person."

She also still holds out hope that she will reconcile with Ronson, even though their partnership was a tumultuous one. Check out Lindsay's appearance on Ellen.

"I really care about Samantha and we'll see what happens," she said. "Maybe when we're fully in the right place. And I love her."

A source for the Sun Times just reported seeing Ronson with another woman who looked strikingly like Lohan, presumably without the insanity though.

The two looked, “cozy” and were clearly together.

The Lohan replacement woman is apparently named, ”Cindy” according to one of Ronson’s friends/informants. Cindy was also recently spotted coming out of Ronson’s home last Sunday.

According to People Magazine, Ronson’s split with Lohan was a result of the constant drama that Lindsay generated. Drama so intense that Ronson’s family even inquired about getting a restraining order on Lohan.

A source close to the Ronson family stated that, “They wanted to know what their options were if she does something crazy. Lindsay can be a loose cannon.”

Now it appears the Ronson clan might be looking into having a restraining order placed against Lohan.

US Weekly reports, "Samantha Ronson's mother and sister asked Beverly Hills police how they could obtain a restraining order three days after Lindsay Lohan was banned from a Ronson family event."

Lohan herself confirmed that the two had split, but downplayed the whole barging into rooms and changing locks drama, saying, "we’re taking a break so I can focus on myself.”

TMZ is reporting that Lohan is not doing well. Sources tell TMZ Lindsay has been an emotional wreck, crying uncontrollably since learning the news.

Luckily for Lohan, the police said that they would not seek her out due to the fact that she is scheduled to appear in court tomorrow. You think that Lohan would be laying low with a warrent out, right? Wrong. Instead, Lohan got into a brawl with girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, so huge, cops were called to her house.

At least six police cars and dozens of photographers were outside Lohan's Beachwood Canyon home in Los Angeles. Officers knocked on the front door, but Ronson and Lohan refused to open it.

Perezhilton reports that "a big banging sound was heard from inside the house, to which everyone outside started going crazy over. 'It sounded like a wall being hit with something loudly," a source on the scene tells us.'"

However today, Lindsay showed up to the Hollywood Hills home she shared with Ronson escorted by assistants and Ali Lohan – most likely to grab her stuff.

Who will Lindsay date next? It's a tough call but we're thinking contenders could include Joe Francis, Anne Heche or the odds could even favor Big Brown.

TMZ reports that neighbors heard screaming throughout the night, but that at around 4:00 a.m., it got worse – much worse, after one of them screamed at the other, "You never say you love me." Glass breaking ensued then Ronson screamed, "If you're gonna break things get out of my house."

One neighbor described the conversation as "wailing, with lots of obscenities."

Ronson then went to the hospital for "exhaustion." Question: Why do celebrities check themselves into the hospital when they're tired? There's this invention called the "nap" which seems to work well for the rest of us.

The New York Daily News is reporting that Sam's DJ fees have skyrocketed from $1,500 to as much as $25K per gig – and not because her "talent" has improved, but because she's now dating a famous person.

Club promoters are paying Sam her inflated prices because they know that when Sam shows up to a gig, Lindsay usually makes an appearance.

"Sam's now asking for a lot more money to spin," says a source. "And she's getting it easily."

Lohan's girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, came to her rescue via her MySpace blog saying, ""It's a pity that some groups feel the need to assault people as opposed to fighting with words.

"It seems lately I am learning that there are too many people who put another species before their fellow man and that's sad. I don't wear fur, but I don't think I have the right to ATTACK those who do. No one has that right," Ronson wrote. 

The nightclub's owner wiped Lindsay down before she and Ronson made their way down the red carpet and into the club.

"I feel like it jinxes it. It's hard. The second I start talking about whomever I'm seeing, a month or two later it's failed."

Although Lindsay never names Ronson in the interview as the object of her affection, she claims she "maybe" bisexual but not a lesbian.

"I think it's pretty obvious who I'm seeing," Lohan admitted. "I think it's no shock to anyone that it's been going on for quite some time. She's a wonderful person and I love her very much."